God’s plan is always better than my plan. We were planning a natural VBAC with the princess. I had a cesarean with Monkey and I knew that a VBAC was going to be risky. We felt that because we wanted a large family that the future health benefits exceeded the risk as more and more complications occur with multiple C-sections, like hemorrhage and placenta previa. We also put the birth of our daughter in God’s hands, so frankly I was 100% confident that nothing would go wrong. Well something went wrong.
Something went wrong
At our initial meeting with the midwife the only red flag that I got that she might try to bait and switch was that she required a trans-vaginal sonogram to check the scar near the end of the pregnancy. I thought there was no way that could go wrong. The likelihood of my scar not being thick enough was minimal because I had waited years and I also drank tons of mending VBAC tea.
At 35 weeks I did the sono and was immediately risked out. My scar was thick enough, but I had a “spot” on it. I was told I was going to have to go to the hospital which I knew would increase the risk of having a repeat cesarean. As a result I was devastated and broke down crying right then and there. Why was this happening? Everything was supposed to be perfect. Wasn’t God in control???
I came home and posted in the ICAN facebook page about what happened. How the Midwife said there was a spot on my scar, and that she wouldn’t even go to the hospital with me to support my wishes in birth. I was looking for some support and I got it! Almost everyone chorused, “Second opinion!”. So I called around and found Katie Miller. She instantly sprang into action. (I think about her at this time with war paint on and a bandanna wrapped around her head blowing in the wind. She stands on a hill with a flag in her hand that says she supports me.) She actually had to fight tooth and nail with my first midwife to get my medical history. (YIKES!)
Switching Midwives at 35/36 weeks gestation was scary!
I kept thinking, “What if I go into labor? What will we do?”. It was so worth the week of stress to be in her care.
Katie was amazing. She signed us up for a birth at home class right away. We just made it in! The “birth class” my first midwife offered was us watching a youtube video of a home birth and then talking about what hospital we’d rush to in an emergency. In the birth class Katie offered us, we learned A LOT of pain management techniques that SAVED me during labor! I found out that Fl law requires all VBACs to have an obgyn consult. (Double YIKES! Why didn’t my first midwife tell me that? Also what was she planning the whole time?) I called Katie crying because the out of pocket cost was so great for the consult. She comforted me, and worked with me.
The obgyn I met with was very VBAC friendly and gave me a huge thumbs up for my home birth. She never once mentioned checking my scar. Now I know it is neither evidence based nor recommended by the American Congress of Obstetricians and Gynecologists.
On the day my VBAC labor started…
On the day my labor finally started, Katie came first thing in the morning. I was sure Grace was going to make an appearance soon! It turns out I was just warming up. At 5 pm. my water broke and everything is a blur from there. I could probably write another ten paragraphs about how it went, and how wonderful Katie and her assistant were, but I won’t. I will say that her unobtrusive presence was the perfect combo of encouragement, monitoring, strength, and peace.
Since my daughter’s birth I’ve talked with four women who have had only terrible things to say about their birth experiences with my first midwife. How she was rude, self-centered, and how they wished they had chose another. I can’t thank Him enough for intervening and changing my plan.
In conclusion, yes, this was God’s perfect plan. He brought us where we needed to be. At 12:41 Am. on September 18th, I reached into the water and lifted my daughter onto my chest. My little miracle.